Stress
Stress is the theme here in the Day house. Michael is stressed about work (even though he'll never admit it), and with this cold spring, fishing season can't start, and fishing is his main stress release. I am stressed - home schooling is really a part time job and planning for next year is turning it into a full time job. I ADORE it, but have no time for cooking/cleaning/running the house. There are other things going on too (we may be refinancing, I will need to clean/stage the house for an appraisal), which are adding to that.
My sweet girl is very good and very obedient, and I've raised her to be good at entertaining herself. Our lives as parents isn't to entertain her 24/7. It's good for her to see we have our own lives, but love her and want to be with her as well. Anyway, she's feeling the stress and I'm realizing, THIS is what has been adding to her emotional outbursts. Since she was a tiny baby, she has been able to feel my stress and has reacted according to how I'm feeling.
This is so unfair to her. Didn't I have a kid, then decide to home school her so I could spend MORE time with her? Time to change some things:
* One of my commitments is gone, so I have more time for her.
* Kara's life is beefing up (adding more play time with friends and extracurricular activities like pottery and horse riding lessons)
* Make sure my life doesn't go away - I can't be a good mom if I'm an empty shell of a person
Yesterday we rode bikes to the playground, hung out outside, and I sat with her in her room while she fell alseep. She told me she's lonely in her room by herself. And I know this isn't coming from being home schooled, we see friends all the time. Three days out of five this week we spent the whole day with friends. She misses me. I'm here, but I'm not here. Yuck.
Do you other moms go through this? Do you catch yourselves and decide it's time to try harder? We all want to give our kids the best life possible, while preparing them for adult life.
My sweet girl is very good and very obedient, and I've raised her to be good at entertaining herself. Our lives as parents isn't to entertain her 24/7. It's good for her to see we have our own lives, but love her and want to be with her as well. Anyway, she's feeling the stress and I'm realizing, THIS is what has been adding to her emotional outbursts. Since she was a tiny baby, she has been able to feel my stress and has reacted according to how I'm feeling.
This is so unfair to her. Didn't I have a kid, then decide to home school her so I could spend MORE time with her? Time to change some things:
* One of my commitments is gone, so I have more time for her.
* Kara's life is beefing up (adding more play time with friends and extracurricular activities like pottery and horse riding lessons)
* Make sure my life doesn't go away - I can't be a good mom if I'm an empty shell of a person
Yesterday we rode bikes to the playground, hung out outside, and I sat with her in her room while she fell alseep. She told me she's lonely in her room by herself. And I know this isn't coming from being home schooled, we see friends all the time. Three days out of five this week we spent the whole day with friends. She misses me. I'm here, but I'm not here. Yuck.
Do you other moms go through this? Do you catch yourselves and decide it's time to try harder? We all want to give our kids the best life possible, while preparing them for adult life.
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